The One With the Rude Lady at the Convention

I was at some sort of work-related convention at a huge center.  I was in the main lobby area trying to figure when I was supposed to go into the big room was where all the action currently was, but was at the moment filled with Japanese businessmen.  The announcer was speaking English, however, because I heard him say sarcastically, "Wow, look at the big orange gay pride flag..." but it was actually a confederate flag hanging up.  They were going to drive a car up a ramp through the flag like the Dukes of Hazard.  

The entrance was cordoned off and they were taking tickets from people when it was their turn to come in.  Tim H. from MM walked past me because it was his time to go in, and he took a bowling ball like everyone else was doing before going in, and rolled it up a two-railed track.  A ticket person said, "oh, so close."  It was like bocce where you had to roll your ball hard enough to knock someone out of place without going too far. 

Still trying to figure out my time, I figured I needed to have lunch first because my session must be after lunch.  The lunch area was a gigantic buffet with themed sections.  I walked by an Italian section that had various slices of pizza and spaghetti, and came to a Mexican section that had eggplant flatbread that looked good (Mexican? dream logic).  I went to get a tray, but the trays were all edible and there were multiples to choose from.  I think I chose an eggplant flatbread tray (again, dream logic) and went to get my eggplant flatbread, which had like 3 lengthwise slices of eggplant and cheese on each bread.  The lady before me had taken hers and was scraping one more slice of eggplant off the last flatbread (the one I wanted).  I said, "Thanks for taking toppings off the last piece of flatbread that I wanted."  She turned and she looked familiar.  I said, "Hey, I've yelled at you for something similar in the past, haven't I?"  She smirked and said, "Yeah you have.  Too bad."  She turned and walked away.  I was bummed but a person that was working the buffet came up to me and asked "Bet you didn't know you could ask for artisan cheese from the farmer's market." and she had a spatula of another piece of eggplant with special cheese that she put on the bread to replace the stolen piece.  I thanked her and took my food to the sitting area.

Unfortunately, the sitting area was several floors down from the buffet and all of a sudden my arms were full with my tray and shopping bags.  With full arms, I tried navigating between people in crowded areas and the stairs had people just sitting there or standing in the way.  A lady helped me get through one area and I said, "Thank you for being the only person that offered to help me this whole time!"  She replied, "Thank you for accepting my help without (I can't remember what she said here exactly but I think it was like 'grabbing onto me'); we understand each other!  Have a great week, great day!"  I kept trying to go down to the sitting area and she followed me.  I finally got to this place where I could go down, but it was big steps down into these terraced planters with no plants, just dirt.  I jumped down two levels, and the lady who helped me who was still above me said, "You DIDN'T just do that!" and laughed.  That's when I woke up.

The One with the Frozen Yogurt

I had a dream last night that two coworkers and I had gone to college together at the college I attended in real life and I think we were in the area for a reunion, or homecoming…  We went to a fast food place to pick up I think a hamburger and frozen yogurt and then were walking barefoot around the large park across the street from the college.  I remember thinking we didn’t pick up our food while in the park, but we did, but I went and got some more frozen yogurt anyway.

The One with the Big Layoff

I was in my cubicle at work and everyone was looking out the windows.  There was a bunch of people outside and I think they laid off a whole division or sub and we were watching them leave all at once, kind of like a fire drill.

I went back to my cubicle and three of us were sitting in my cube with Mike (who didn't say a word), eating breakfast.  I was trying to tell Jeff about a dream I had with him in it, but there were two ladies who looked like lesbians who kept trying to listen.

I told them I couldn't tell the dream with them there but they didn't leave, and finally I said 'SHOO!'  And one said, "Was it a dream that they came and found porn on your work computer because you're so adorable?"  I said, "Yeah that's it!  Shoo!!"

I was eating something that I can't remember, Sarah was eating red jello and Jeff had creamy rice with peaches.  Sarah tried some of the rice and peaches but mixed it with her jello and was like, urm....  I thought about trying it but I asked Jeff if he was sick and he said yes.

Then I woke up.

The One with the Used Toothpicks

Just before waking up this morning, but after my alarm had gone off, I had a dream that I was in a kitchen. It was in an apartment and not one that I recognized. My sister was eating some kind of roll and it looked like it had finely chopped broccoli on top of it and she was eating only the topping.

I asked her about the rolls and I cut one in half and put it in the toaster.

Next thing I remember was that I was outside with Debbie and one other person - maybe Jose. We were in a town with lots of eclectic shops. I wasn't sure if it was a big or small.

We went into a small shop that had all hand-made baked goods like poppy seed muffins and little loaves of sweet bread. I was thinking of getting a muffin but don't think I did. Debbie got something though.

At the cash register, they had a refrigerator and the door had a sign that they reused toothpicks and that they washed them and you could put the used ones in little holes in the door. I had a toothpick so I put it in one.

While we were in the store I remember that I had put the roll in the toaster and never taken it how, and was thinking how it could get stuck and cause a fire.

When we were leaving, I did something and accidentally stuck my knuckle in Deb's eye.

The One at Taco Bell

I stopped at the Taco Bell in Westfield, and it was generally in the same location as the real one, although the stores and parking lot layout around it was different.

It was a larger-than-normal building for Taco Bell, and divided in half cross-wise. If you were looking at the front door from the outside, the left was where you ordered and there was one of those people corrals, and the right was where the seating was and there was a second entrance on the side.

Also, it was one of those Taco Bells that had another restaurant in the same location. I can't remember what the other restaurant was, though.

I had to park pretty far away from the entrance because there were so many handicapped spots. I ended up parking near a gas station where the attendants looked really grubby and shady. I was wary about the safety of my car (which I think was the same as my real-life one) but since it was near the gas station, I figured it was all right.

I started ordering at the counter and the cashier asked for my drink order first. Then John came in and she took his drink order before I had ordered the rest of my meal. Then another woman from work, Sara, came in and she took her drink order too. I knew it was weird and was kind of annoyed, but since I knew everyone I was OK at this point.

When Sara was asked about her drink, she asked when the last time they had Lysol'd - she said, "Is your Lysol fresh?" The cashier said, "Yes..." And Sara asked, "Well, what's the date on the Lysol?" and the woman said 8/21/2009. Sara said, "Oh, 2009. Great! But I'm not going to get anything to drink."

We were all confused, and Sara said that on that date the weather was good.

Next, a guy I didn't know came in and put in his drink order, and at this point I was getting annoyed because I was really hungry and still hadn't put my food order in.

And still, Andrea came in and put her drink order in. I knew it was Andrea ******** in the dream, but when I had to sign her receipt, I had to sign her last name that was only four letters, although I don't remember the name.

We put in our food orders, and I had coupons in my black bag. I had one for a drink coupon, which I asked about and woman didn't know I had given it to her (there was something else to this, but I can't understand what I said on the dictation machine!).

Andrea had gone out to her car for some reason and it was time to start signing the credit card receipts. I thought at first that the woman put everything on my credit card, but someone she had rung them up all separately.

I was starving and Andrea was outside, so I was going to sign it for her, and I wrote out "Andrea" and was about to write that four-letter last name and the man asked if she knew I was doing that when Andrea came back in. She saw what I was doing and said, "No, you can't do that, how dare you!"

She took the pen and was going to finish when I woke up.

The One With the McDonald's Fiasco

I was on some sort of road trip with the parents, I think Dawn was there and the little girl who lives next to my parents was with us as well. We stopped at a rest stop that I had a really huge McDonald’s to get breakfast and it was like a really big buffet. You served yourself, but it wasn’t all-you-can-eat – you still paid for what you chose.

I remember picking some fruit, Panetone soaked in something, hash browns and I think an Egg McMuffin. Jim was there near the Panetone because he tried something near it (I think the bread pudding?) and said it tasted like it was soaked in alcohol, like rum or something.

When I was getting something, a woman next to me in the line at the buffet thing like backed into me. She was wearing this light blue knit sweater and was kind of fat – she had like rolls of fat that like went into my plate and like picked up some of my food. So I kind of yelled at her but got out of the way.

I went around the rest of the buffet and then went to get in line to pay. Then the same woman cuts in front of me and backs into me again, this time getting pretty much everything off my plate. I totally went off on her and was yelling at her (can’t remember what I said) but I was SO mad. I threw away what little was left on my plate and didn’t go back to get more and just stormed back to the others.

My parents and sister had turned into my neighbors, I think, because I remember talking with one of them about it as we walked back to the car. The woman passed me on the way and I think she was going to apologize but I told her, “I WARNED you to stay away from me!!”. I was close to just smashing her in the face.

The One with the Queen of England

Melany came over and we went to see someone she knew from work that had just moved into a new place. On the way there I saw Kathy F. from college and she was mad that I hadn’t called or returned her calls. I think I used to be her roommate. We kind of just went by her and she was yelling that she had something in her purse and was yelling that she was going to dump it in the first stiff wind once she got to Arizona.

We were going up the stairwell into a room that was empty and smelled of varnished new floors and there was a woman on the porch putting stuff around (moving in). We got to the living room and Melany introduced herself to a guy – the guy she knew. She introduced me and he asked me if I was up all night partying and I said ‘no’. He said that everyone else was. I asked why. He said because of Linda. I asked who Linda was. Everyone seemed shocked that I didn’t know and said ‘The queen, silly.’ I asked if she was the queen of Canada, and someone scoffed and said they don’t give parties for the queen of Canada.

I turned and it was the Queen of England (Elizabeth, not ‘Linda’), on the couch, kind of lying on her side, resting. Melany said ‘they got your monitor set up, huh? It looks better (like it saved space).’ There was a cake pan near the monitor and apparently it didn’t work out well because it and a triangular shaped cake jutted too much into the room, not like the square monitor.

We ended up talking about a legend or something that guy who did something in one era was also the same guy that did something in another era (by traveling in time?). It was a big deal and when I woke up I felt like it was some kind of religious revelation but I can’t remember that part!! It was almost like the same guy that killed Caesar (Brutus) was the same guy that killed Jesus (Judas). They used lemon cake or something to do it. We were talking about it and I think they said they had heard something like that and I said I thought they (meaning Christians) didn’t believe in past lives. The queen said something that Ukrainians thought that the lemon cakes worked.

The One When My Family Goes Out to Eat / The One Where I’m a Vampire

I went out to eat sushi with my family - My Mom, my Dad, my sister and my Aunt Susie was there. It was Sakura but it was in Northampton on kind of a hill and we had to drive up a really steep road to get to the parking lot. Once we got there, the parking lot was small and we had to park illegally. We were the first ones there for the whole day - it was because it was Chinese New Year and sushi is Japanese food. We sat at a round table and ate a ton of sushi - it was the first time eating it for everyone except me and I think Aunt Susie. The guy that owns Sakura was there too. We got a jar of tobiko and there was a price sticker on it for $2.99. I was surprised it was so cheap.

There were kids sitting at a nearby table playing with chopsticks and one flew over to our table. They kept switching people's chopsticks and the one that ended up at our table had little notches in it like they were making lincoln logs out of them. On top of the sushi bar was a plate of sushi - like samples - that people could go up and smell to make sure it was fresh. I did this.

We talked about how we haven't spoken to Aunt Susie in a long time and how Dawn and I used to call her 'goo goo' (which means Aunt in Chinese). She and my mom almost got into an argument about how they stopped talking. Susie said Mom used to say stuff about her boyfriend, Peter. They were civil, but there was definitely tension between them.
For dessert we had a big plate of Oreo cookies on the table but my Dad had a piece of cake.

Next thing I remember I was a vampire and going around killing people in the restaurant. The family was gone at this point. I went outside and continued. At this point it was night and dark out. I had fangs and sharp claws and remember feeling invincible.

Sometimes I would feed (although I do remember biting necks, I don't remember sucking any blood), sometimes just kill. I was looking for someone specific, a guy (Bryan maybe?) – I think I wanted to kill him, but he went to some mountain/hill. A monster that resembled the sewer monster from X-files told me. There were other monsters in the dream but they were on my side. I was definitely a 'bad guy.'

There were pills in the dream that made me/monsters stronger or made humans strong like vampires. One girl that was similar to a slayer but not as powerful was chasing me for a bit. I had to run from her at first but then I took a pill and picked her up and threw her off a balcony. She was the only one that threatened me - otherwise I still felt invincible.

At one point I remember being in a public bathroom, sitting on the floor across from the sinks, leaning back so they couldn't see me in the mirrors (apparently the vampire-mirror thing didn't apply). I was going to kill the kids (a lot of the people I killed were teenagers or young adults - like 16 - 23 years old) as they came in the bathroom. I couldn't tell if was a guys or girls bathroom - but there were both guys and girls in it.

I didn't recognize most of the people in the dream except for my family and the guy from Sakura. All the other people were people I didn't know.