The One on the Yacht

I was with the Mikes on their yacht.  We were in the main cabin with a bunch of their friends and family and Michael and a woman I didn't recognize in real life but knew in the dream were chastising a young woman about her attire.  She looked fine to me, but they were telling her she looked dumpy and should have dressed up more.  The other women were semi-dressed up, not super casual and not formal attire.  The men, however, were generally wearing pretty casual clothes like chino shorts, t-shirts or polo shirts.  I think I was wearing chino shorts and a polo shirt.  Mike (Michael's husband) was wearing shorts and a t-shirt - very casual.  

The woman was a bit more aggressive toward the young lady and I got very mad, and I walked up to her and said, "You'd best stay away from me.  You're not my type of person."

Next I remember, my friend Mandar had arrived, although we were no longer on the yacht.  I gave him a big bear hug and was thrilled to see him, although I couldn't remember his name.  I introduced him to Mike, and we showed each other these banners/posters of us wearing martial arts uniforms and posing.

When I woke, I was still pretty upset at the way the lady and Michael were acting toward the young woman.  

The One With the Rude Lady at the Convention

I was at some sort of work-related convention at a huge center.  I was in the main lobby area trying to figure when I was supposed to go into the big room was where all the action currently was, but was at the moment filled with Japanese businessmen.  The announcer was speaking English, however, because I heard him say sarcastically, "Wow, look at the big orange gay pride flag..." but it was actually a confederate flag hanging up.  They were going to drive a car up a ramp through the flag like the Dukes of Hazard.  

The entrance was cordoned off and they were taking tickets from people when it was their turn to come in.  Tim H. from MM walked past me because it was his time to go in, and he took a bowling ball like everyone else was doing before going in, and rolled it up a two-railed track.  A ticket person said, "oh, so close."  It was like bocce where you had to roll your ball hard enough to knock someone out of place without going too far. 

Still trying to figure out my time, I figured I needed to have lunch first because my session must be after lunch.  The lunch area was a gigantic buffet with themed sections.  I walked by an Italian section that had various slices of pizza and spaghetti, and came to a Mexican section that had eggplant flatbread that looked good (Mexican? dream logic).  I went to get a tray, but the trays were all edible and there were multiples to choose from.  I think I chose an eggplant flatbread tray (again, dream logic) and went to get my eggplant flatbread, which had like 3 lengthwise slices of eggplant and cheese on each bread.  The lady before me had taken hers and was scraping one more slice of eggplant off the last flatbread (the one I wanted).  I said, "Thanks for taking toppings off the last piece of flatbread that I wanted."  She turned and she looked familiar.  I said, "Hey, I've yelled at you for something similar in the past, haven't I?"  She smirked and said, "Yeah you have.  Too bad."  She turned and walked away.  I was bummed but a person that was working the buffet came up to me and asked "Bet you didn't know you could ask for artisan cheese from the farmer's market." and she had a spatula of another piece of eggplant with special cheese that she put on the bread to replace the stolen piece.  I thanked her and took my food to the sitting area.

Unfortunately, the sitting area was several floors down from the buffet and all of a sudden my arms were full with my tray and shopping bags.  With full arms, I tried navigating between people in crowded areas and the stairs had people just sitting there or standing in the way.  A lady helped me get through one area and I said, "Thank you for being the only person that offered to help me this whole time!"  She replied, "Thank you for accepting my help without (I can't remember what she said here exactly but I think it was like 'grabbing onto me'); we understand each other!  Have a great week, great day!"  I kept trying to go down to the sitting area and she followed me.  I finally got to this place where I could go down, but it was big steps down into these terraced planters with no plants, just dirt.  I jumped down two levels, and the lady who helped me who was still above me said, "You DIDN'T just do that!" and laughed.  That's when I woke up.

The One With the Office Space for Lease

I was speaking with Irene, who was telling me that she is leaving a building that she was leasing and that it would be a good place for me to expand into as a second location for my business.  When I asked where it was, she gave me the name of a town in Connecticut but I had never heard of it and had no idea where in the state it might be.  I told her as much, and she said "It's near xxxx, and xxxx."  I don't remember the names of the towns but they were also ones that I had never heard of.  I looked it up on my phone and it was in the middle of nowhere, about an hour from the office I currently work out of.

We took a drive out there in separate cars, and you had to drive over a covered bridge, then had to drive through the hallway of a big barn with business on either side of the hall, then down a small road that ended in a tiny cul-de-sac and little parking lot.  The parking lot was for the building where her office was.  There was at least one other small business in the building, which was about the size of a medium-sized house.  

I decided it was too far away and wouldn't be much benefit.  I got into my car and put much socks on (for some reason I had taken them off), stepped out of the car briefly before I realized I had left the car in reverse and it started slowly backing up.  I jumped in and stopped it not long before it would have backed into the building.  

I turned around in the cul-de-sac, although a woman driving a Reminder car was coming down the small road at that point and stopped to talk to a woman who was walking, but she moved out of the way when she saw me trying to get by.

I put on Waze to get home, drove up the little road, through the barn and looked to my left and saw the road leading down to the water.  I came up sooner than I expected, so I had to back up and turn out.  I was driving down toward the bridge when Waze said, "In xxx feet, resurface.  Then we'll walk.  It will take one month."  I realized I wasn't heading to the bridge but to a wide hiking trail (probably a former road) that was partially flooded.  I turned around and started driving back to the barn but that's when I woke up.

The One With The Stunt Buddy

I dreamed that I was outside with some people, perhaps at a party or some other gathering.  At one point, there was a mist/miasma in the air that made you somewhat buoyant and I was able to pretty easily do a backflip.  Tricia and Justin from the tricking gym were a bit away practicing kicks and stuff when I yelled over to get their attention to show them, but then the scene changed.

Next, we were on a street and there was a car accident.  It was a strange mix of real life and not --- the car accident was real but also a stunt at the same time.  We were talking about it when suddenly Tricia started screaming because one guy from the car accident started shooting the other driver.  Somehow I knew that the one being shot was the "badder" of the two.  The was on all fours, crawling away, but had a gun at his hip.  The other guy looked like he was shooting him in the rear end.

Next I know there was a second car accident and somehow Tricia was involved.  I don't know if she was driving or a pedestrian but she was lying on her back in the road.  I ran over and said that I knew first aid and asked where she was hurt.  That's when I woke up. 

Background:  Tricia in real life recently performed some stunts where she was both hit by a car and was in car accidents.

The One Where I Get to Hug Wil Goodbye

In real life, my friend Wil recently died suddenly and I did not get to say goodbye, and his funeral was family-only.

In the dream, we were standing in an open field playing catch with a wiffle ball.  He was throwing the ball firmly and directly to me and I was catching it easily with one hand.  I was throwing it back in a little more complicated ways, but he also caught the ball; we didn't drop it once.

Eventually, I realized that he had died, and that it was a dream.  I ran to him and gave him a big hug and woke up crying, but feeling a bit happy that in some way I got to hug him goodbye.

The One With The High School Reunion

I was in a hotel or conference center or mall when I started seeing a bunch of people I used to go to high school with.  I asked someone what was going on and it turns out that TC had sent an email to like half the school about some kind of event.  Somehow, the other half of the school found out and showed up anyway.  Some of asked the group, "Who wasn't invited by T?" and a whole bunch of people raised their hands.  

The event was related to Martial Arts tricking, which T had been doing.  I remember asking "She's doing my stuff now?"  At the end of the dream I started "sparring" with her, but we weren't making contact (yet) but in my mind I was fully preparing to kick the crap out of her.  

About half the people were actual people from real life high school, like LM, MS...

There was a guy who I didn't remember.  He had a lot of scars on his elbows and forearms like he had cut himself a long time ago.  There were also cuts in the side of a mountain and he had planted flowers in the cuts that made words, but only some of them made sense, the others were gibberish.  It was like how some people use tattoos to turn scars into something beautiful.  He was kind of upset and offended that I didn't remember him, as were some other people.  

He kept calling me either a blend of the words "Jin" or "Chink" or he kept swapping between the two.  I grabbed him by the hair and told him to stop saying that word, but he didn't really know what he was saying.  Someone had to look it up and explain to him that it was like the N word for Chinese people but there was an online definition (like Urban Dictionary) that referred to degrees of pressure while jerking off.  

He said "Oh my god, I didn't know." and was apologetic.

I ended up throwing a cup full of ice and water on a woman that I actually didn't recognize but knew was part of the popular girl clique.  

The One With the Photoshoot and the Problematic Model

I was trying to take some photos of a woman I know named Mariel but her name in the dream was Anna.  I had my DSLR and we were in a sun room of a house I didn't recognize, but three sides of the room were large windows with blinds that were open to let the light in.

Anna was horrible at taking direction - she couldn't (or wouldn't) do what I was asking her to do, like turn her head in a certain direction, or adjust the position of her arms or shoulders.  I even tried posing her like a Barbie doll and she wouldn't hold that either.  I'd fix one thing, move on to the next, and she'd move the first thing I had fixed.

At one point there was a guy there (maybe a guy I know named Otavio) who was going to be in some shots with her.  He was sitting at a table near a window in front of a typewriter and she was supposed to look over his shoulder at what he was doing, or out the window pensively, but she wouldn't look in the right direction.

There was also another woman that I believe was a coworker or something, and she looked like Victoria Beckham, and we were both wearing large Anna Wintour style sunglasses and we had taken them off at one point while adjusting the scene and we had switched them by mistake.  I put hers on but they were too big, but then when I put mine on, she said that mine were too big and that I needed smaller ones (which is true, I need small frames for my face shape in real life and it's always a struggle finding them).

While adjusting the scene, we found that the "typewriter" was simply a stack of thin books (like that wouldn't have shown up in a photo).

Also at one point, we were trying to take photos on the street in a big city that looked like maybe New York, and a drag queen walked by and wanted me to take some photos with his disposable camera but then he walked away and just expected us to get the photos to him.

The One Where I Was the Musical Comedy Act, of Sorts.

I was in a restaurant and it was time for me to head downstairs to the first floor to the bar section where I was an act of sorts.  I went downstairs and sat at the piano, but I had a guitar.  There was one older gentleman with gray hair, he was balding, and had glasses.  I don't remember seeing a computer or laptop, but I got the impression that he was working somehow.

My thing was I was going to play somewhat funny music.  In the dream, I was about as good at the guitar as I am in real life, which means I only know a few chords and struggle with timely transitions.  I said that I was very good at guitar (obviously being sarcastic) and that I could "learn him" how to play guitar if he wanted.

I started playing the Sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel but the lyrics were made up on the fly about how I hit an old woman with my car.  She had her hair up in one of those tiny buns on the top of her head and it left that shape in the side of my car when I hit her. 

The old gentleman found that somewhat amusing, so I kept the subject on her and would sometimes stop of make comments, like how some old lady's hair looks nice but when you go to touch it, it's wiry and rough.  At that, he laughed and nodded like I knew exactly what I was talking about.

I finished that song and asked him what I thought, and he joked that I was going to have to "learn him" how to play the guitar like that some time.  I mentioned that I was making up lyrics on the fly, and a nearby waitress chimed in with some lyric suggestions that I don't recall.  I started talking with her and I woke up.

The One with the Jogging, Mushrooms and Paparazzi Photo

I was jogging in a residential neighborhood with a client of mine who is a runner.  In real life, it has been raining a lot, so there have been a lot of mushrooms lately, which I love looking for and taking photos of.  

So as we were jogging, we were seeing them on people's lawns, including some really nice chanterelles, and I had to stop to take some photos, even though I felt bad for pausing the jogging.

I don't remember how the two parts were connected, but then it came up that a friend of mine (Garrett) had been involved in something of a scandal, because a photo had been taken of him -- I don't remember for sure, but I think he was buying drugs, and I seem to recall it was at a place like the Boatslip in Provincetown.  

The photo was black and white and old looking, and reminded me of the photo of Jack in the Shining at the end. 

The One at the Mall

I dreamed that I was at a pretty large mall.  I went to a pet store that had tiny giraffes in the bird area and little frogs outside of tanks that would lose their legs if you picked them up.  I picked one up and a leg came off, and then another before I put it back.  Then after that I saw a sign that said not to pick up the frogs.

There was another area where they kept bringing out animals to interact with.  First there was a baby goat, so I got down on all fours and it climbed on my back.  At this point, my friend Mark met me at the store.  Then a woman dressed and made up like Marilyn Monroe brought out a lizard that looked like a baby alligator as it raced over to me, but then changed into more of a small gila monster.  At first it looked aggressive, but when I pet it, it became very affectionate like a cat.

Later I was in a restaurant or pub that had this weird bicycle looking thing and if you pulled a ring on a chain, it would open a gate into a secret section that was sort of like a cross between a game and escape room.  It was like a car with a video screen.  I "drove" the car into an area that had fire on the video screen and had to find stuff to put into funnel-like receptacles to put it out.  

A couple of kids came in while I was doing it, and they were trying to play it with me. 

Then I woke up.

The One with Hide and Seek and the Vote

 The first thing I remember was me hooking up with a friend of mine (that I used to work with) in a big, old house.  The friend was also the project manager of a big effort and there was a vote about to take place.  I was a key vote, but the project manager was trying to stall the vote for some reason.

I was hiding all over the house trying to avoid Jen (who is a woman that I used to work with) who was trying to find me so the vote could take place.

I hid behind furniture and in closets.  Two other women found me in a closet and commented, "Oh, you're back in there" and laughed.  Once, I pulled down the stairs to the attic (the kind that fold up into the ceiling) to trick Jen into going up into the attic.

At one point, I ran out of the house and started running away but had to go back because if they knew I left the house, it would count as an absence and the vote could move forward without me.

The One With The Fruit Hulling Job

 I had gotten a new job at a fruit processing place or was possibly just touring it, and I was learning from a woman who ran a machine that processed strawberries and raspberries.

You'd take a fruit from the left, put it in the machine, and an arm would come down and scoop off the top (for both the strawberries and the raspberries).  All the strawberries seemed to be the same size (very large - like almost green pepper size), and you'd send them along on one conveyor.

The raspberries, however, had to be sorted by size.  There were 5 raspberries of different sizes as examples and you'd match yours up and send it down one of the 5 conveyors. She'd take the fruit, have it hulled and hand it to me to sort.

At one point, I noticed that she was wearing a face mask but I had forgotten mine, so I went to grab it and came back.

One of the strawberries was too big, and the arm would miss (doesn't make sense, I know).  The woman said, "Don't move the strawberry toward the arm.  Let it miss and you'll get an error code.  'B', no wait, 'G'.  Yeah, 'G', and that means 'Beetsey'".  I asked, "Beetsey?".  She responded, "Yup!  Look it up!".

She moved to the side and let me do both parts, and I noticed that while she was wearing a face mask, she was coughing and sucking on a cough drop.  I asked her if she was OK and she said, "I feel good, but I have this cough."  I told her she should tell her boss and she said, "Yeah..." 

And then I woke up.

The One on the Tropical Vacation

Jose and I went on vacation to some tropical location.  We were walking along the beach and I wore my new Earthrunners sandals.  There was a hole in the sand, and when I looked inside, there were these interesting clams that had multicolored stripes on their shells and large clam beards.  When I picked one up, there was a label on them that said "Shrimp Clams".  

A guy walked by with his wife and young boy and was asking me what I was looking at, but he only spoke Spanish.  I didn't know the word for clam so I said "camarones clams" and asked Jose what the word for clam was and he said, but I don't remember what it was.  

Then the guy asked us for our opinion on which of two sunglasses he had we liked better.  There was one pair that had white mirrored lenses but the eye frames were too far apart for his face.  The other had amber lenses and looked better but the frames were too narrow and kind of made him look cross eyed.  I told him I liked the white ones better.

I took my sandals off and waded in the water for a bit, which was super warm, and then realized my sandals were supposed to be good in the water so I tried wading while having them on.

We wanted to take a photo near a sign near the beach, but there were a ton of people hanging around it, so we ended up going onto a stairwell to take a photo there, and then man with the glasses and two other guys came to take the photo with us.  We never took the photo because his wife and kid went downstairs into a lower level where shops were to go to the bathroom and we were waiting for them.  An older couple who were waiting for us to move (although I thought they were just hanging out on the stairs like a lot of people were) to go downstairs got a little frustrated and the wife said "let's just go down this way instead" and I apologized because I didn't know they wanted to get by, and they should've just said something.

I vaguely remember walking around a store, looking for the bathroom (I had to pee in real life) but the only "bathrooms" where these big tables you sat at that had holes in the side that you peed into.  What women did I have no idea.

Next thing I remember we were at a restaurant and Alexa was sitting to my right - she came along on the vacation with us.  At one point we were looking at her iPad and a photo came up of her lying her back with her lifting up her waistband, like a teasing photo like she was going to take a sexy picture.  She took the iPad back quickly because she didn't realize it would come up and she was a little embarrassed but only because the guys that wanted to take the photo with us were at the table with us too.

On my iPad there was a photo that she must've photoshopped and added to my iPad as a joke - it was her with an erect penis and she was holding onto it like she was masturbating but was crying - it was supposed to be "how'd I get this?"  I was asking her how she got it onto my iPad - did she guess my passcode or had I left it unlocked (the latter was true in this case).  I asked her to take it off and she did so by tearing off a paper card at the back of my iPad with the photo on it.  While we were on the trip, I had this like paper cardboard cover put on my iPad (maybe from the resort) and I noticed there were two more that were put over the original one.  

That's when I woke up and immediately texted Alexa about the photoshopped pic.

The One With The Frog Dissections

I have a class today on instrument-assisted soft tissue mobilization (IASTM) and last night I had a nightmare where I was in class but we had to do frog dissections. 

We were given tadpoles that were frozen and we had to reconstitute them by pouring "440" over them, which was an alcoholic beverage like 151 rum but a different number.  We'd leave them in a container for a few minutes and very quickly they went from tadpoles to frogs, of all different types and sizes.

Then we had to kill them before dissecting, so people were spread out all over trying to kill the frogs - I was walking around trying to find a spot to do it, even though I didn't want to do the dissection at all.  People were around the room, in stairwells, everywhere, trying all kinds of methods to kill the frogs with varying success.

Some were using ligatures to try to strangle the frogs, I think I was going to try drowning the frog.

That's pretty much all I remember.

Dying In Your Dreams

I've heard several times in several places that if you die in your dreams, you die in real life.  I've even seen debates about how you can't prove it because if someone dies in their dream and dies in real life you'd never know.

Yes, you can verify it because I died in my dream and I'm still alive.  I had someone poke me with a stick just to be sure I wasn't a ghost like in my dream after I died...

Dream: The One Where I Die

Have you ever died in your dreams?  If not, how close have you come?  I'd love to hear about it... post a comment and let me know.

The One with the Wedding Plans and Nanny Joke

I had a dream this morning that I was staying at home hotel or something where they had mats in the dining area where we did gymnastics when it wasn't time to eat.  Then I remember having lunch/dinner with Lisa to discuss her wedding.  I ordered a panino (from her - she was also the one making the food) and she had left pages from a steno book in my sandwich.  I didn't mind because I knew she was distracted about the wedding.

She was a little stressed out about the date - she kept saying, "It's the only date we could get."  She was saying it like she already knew I couldn't make it but it was January 2nd and I think I could make it, it was just not the best date ever.

The next thing I remember was Mary sitting to my right (even though Lisa and I had been facing each other at a table for two), telling me "a nanny is like a receptionist who rubs lotion on us when it's time for bed" - meaning when it was time to have sex for the people who hired the nanny.  I started laughing so hard that I spit a little tomato (a bit get on Mary's arm) and could barely breathe and my throat started to hurt.

Then I woke up and immediately posted the joke on Facebook.

The One with the Singing in the Tunnel

I had a dream I was walking through the tunnels at work and listening to music on my phone with no headphones and singing along loudly. There was a bunch of songs I was listening to but then I remember listening to Glitter and Be Gay and started skipping and then Bridget from work heard me and started singing along too.

She was a very good singer and started going through the tunnel with me.  It got to the part with a very high note and she hit it very well.  I was pretty surprised.

We ran into some of the people that empty the trash at night and I had her sing it again for them.

I had trouble finding the song again on my phone apparently because I kept spelling Chenoweth wrong, but then I eventually found it by searching only for "Cheno".

The One with the Frozen Yogurt

I had a dream last night that two coworkers and I had gone to college together at the college I attended in real life and I think we were in the area for a reunion, or homecoming…  We went to a fast food place to pick up I think a hamburger and frozen yogurt and then were walking barefoot around the large park across the street from the college.  I remember thinking we didn’t pick up our food while in the park, but we did, but I went and got some more frozen yogurt anyway.

The One With The Liver Cancer

Last night I had a dream that I had a tumor on my liver that had metastasized.  The dream occurred on a Friday and a dentist was due to remove my liver on the following day, in the evening.  It wasn't a transplant - they were just going to remove the liver, but it meant I was going to die - they essentially were going to put me down.

So the whole dream, I knew that I had about a day and a half to live and most of the dream was trying to get everything in order.

I wrapped up work where I'm currently employed and went to the place where I worked previously and returned a folder of work that I had kept with me for many years for some reason.  I was trying to make sure that all the loose ends of my life were tied up.  Mxxx, a lady I worked with was still there and I returned the work to her and updated her with what needed to be done.  Outside her office was Kxxx, I guy I worked for at my current employer and he was sitting at the desk in his office, but the desk was pushed against the door frame, with him facing out.

Next, I remember being in a house with a little African American girl that I don't think I knew in the dream, but I was telling her about stuff.  She was probably about 8 or 9 and she said, "Do you know what you're doing?  You're saying goodbye."  I said that I knew, and I started crying.

Then I was outside in her yard and the kids from her large family were walking in a line, single file, toward the house.  There were probably 10 or 12 kids.

I went to my parents' house next, and my mother and father were doing some work in the garage.  I asked my mom to call the dentist and ask for another week so I could have more time to get my life in order.  I wanted to sit down with my parents and let them know how my stuff and money needed to be allocated out.  My mom said that they wouldn't do it, but I remember telling her that it doesn't hurt to ask.

While my mom was making the call, I left the garage and stood in the driveway with my sister.  The little girl down the street was playing in the road near her house and I hid behind a tree so that she wouldn't see me and come over.  But the little girl's mother threw a frisbee into a large bush in my parents' yard, so the little girl headed over.  While I was in the driveway waiting, I heard my mom tell the doctor's office that the little girl had said that she was upset because Uncle Dan had pouty lips and looked confused.  She made that up to try to convince them to move the appointment.

My mom finished the call, and the administrative assistant named Joanne told her that the doctor wouldn't or couldn't move the appointment and that I'd just have to resent it.

I woke up in real life, recorded my dream on my phone, and when I went back to sleep I re-entered the dream.  The only thing I remember from the second round was that Jxxx was ignoring me even though I was dying.  He said that he had other stuff to do.

The One with Deborah Henson-Conant

The details of this dream are vague for me - I got paged for work at 2:00 and realized I had been dreaming...

I dreamed that I was a big outside music festival with a female friend I can't identify now.  It was night and it was one of those festivals with multiple stages with one large main stage.

We walked by Deborah Henson-Conant who was either in transition with her equipment or she was setting up to do her show just on the side of the sidewalk, similar to what she does in real life sometimes.  I stopped to say "hi" and take a photo with her.

My friend took the camera and I went to Deborah's left and we put an arm around each other like you normally do in a photo, but she kept leaning really far to the right, making us fall to the ground.  We tried a couple of times but I don't think we ever got the photo.